Bitches Get Riches Merchandise is HERE AT LAST!

We want to quit our jobs and do this full-time.

That sentence may have been easy to read, but you have no idea how hard it was to write!

I mean, I doubt it’s shocking. If given the opportunity, who wouldn’t want to be a caring Internet grandma slash pushy rich best friend who gives great advice but also needs to take it down two notches on a full-time basis?

We’ve been running Bitches Get Riches for just about two years now. We’ve started to get lovely, heartfelt emails from our readers. “I asked for a raise and I got it!” “My first job starts Monday and I wouldn’t have aced the interview without your help!” “I finally moved out and I’m so happy!” Absolutely nothing feels better than hearing you’ve helped someone improve their lives. Nothing.

And that got us to thinking: How many more people could we reach if we could give Bitches Get Riches our all?

The cobbler’s children have no monetization strategies

We badly want to branch out into new media. What does that mean? Podcasts? Videos? Those CG porn banner ads with Overwatch characters?! We don’t really know. But we know it’ll require more of our time than we currently have to give.

We currently split our focus between this and our day jobs. One nourishes our souls, and one pays the bills. We would like to tip-toe towards a future where BGR does both. Because doing both is freaking exhausting.

Yet it’s really hard to figure out how to monetize this blog ethically.

At time of writing we have 90 Patreon donors. Those donors are the only reason Bitches Get Riches is still here. They’ve kept the lights on through major growth and traffic spikes. But our most loyal readers are mostly young and mostly poor, and we can only squeeze so much before it feels kinda gross and wrong.

On the other hand, we’ve gotten a lot of offers to do affiliate programs and sponsored posts. It’s tempting. Especially when those offers are for four figures. Eep! Yankee Candle should make a Corporate Money-scented candle, because that shit smells amazing.

That said, we feel strongly that our readers rely on us to be real. It just doesn’t feel right to push products we ourselves don’t use and love. So we’re not doing it, for now. (If we eventually do, we’ll be transparent about that.)

So in the spirit of trying other things, we’re opening a merch shop!

The Bitches Get Riches Etsy Shop

We have shirts! We have mugs! We have bags! We are bags!

Check it out:

THE BITCHES GET RICHES OFFICIAL MERCH SHOP

And yes, everything is just in time for the holidays. Which holidays? Pssh, Candlenights, obviously! The only winter holiday with rules people actually want to follow—c’mon, be cool and niiice.

So please check it out. If you were thinking of buying some clever graphic tee for your best girl (a relationship designation from the Beach Boy era I would like to bring back immediately), maybe buy one from us! It will help us figure out if we can swing the whole full-time bossypants thing.